Let’s go to my yacht in the West Keys

2012/07/03 § Leave a comment

For some reason I fell out of bed around 9 o’clock. This fortunate twist of fate gave me the chance to head of in time for a exploration of the Everglades and the keys. The glades really are somewhat of a no-show. I had been warned, but it is true. Spectacular is not the first term that comes to mind. Imagine a really large flat area with some type of gras. Just that the whole thing looks like a field of wheat after a strong summer rain.

Now of course you can undertake all kinds of activities. As usually, if an attraction is not too attractive in itself the tourist industry is quite nifty in coming up with ways of pulling your money out of your wallet. However, been there, done that, did not buy the t-shirt.

Next stop Islamorada (purple island?). On the way some more island of the keys. I did not go all the way to key West. The ride was simply too far for my taste. And as they say, keep something undone so you have a reason to return. I am sure this was not the last Miami has seen of me. Next time I will bring a suitcase of cash. If ya got cheese in Miami you are da big cheese. And that is certainly much more fun in the end.

They keys are nice of course. However, the beaches are not that nice before you reach key west. The keys are more about fishing, water skying, diving, and any other water sport you can think of. You will find some absolutely mind blowing homes here. You can really envy those lucky bastards who have their holiday mansion right by the water, of course including the complementary yacht.

Party in the city where the heat is on – bienvenido a Miami

2012/07/01 § 2 Comments

If you ever plan to party as if you mean it, come to Miami. There ain’t so much to add to that really. Great crowd last night. You better bring some dough though. Beer tagged at 15 bucks bottom price. Best misunderstanding ever: “I take a beer and a tab-water.” I got a Heineken and a red bull. WTF? I mean, Heineken, that is not even close to being beer!

The ladies, you ask? Well. No words for that. Sure, if you know to party in Scandinavia you may not be too surprised. But for a German there may be a lot to take in. People here sure know the meaning of the term “dress with style”. As always, the German women in the crowd drew attention for a more experimental approach to fashion.

The club made sure that there was some erotic stimulation by “putting up” exotic dancers in every corner. A girl in our group compared the women with hookers. I am rather certain though that she meant the guests rather than the dancers. Getting attention apparently works via buying it. On the other hand, that is not specific for Miami of course.

Say what now???

To my surprise it is entirely possible to smoke at the club. I do not know how they avoid the smell of smoke everywhere, but they do. Their ventilation system must be grade A. The dope they inhale must be grade A too, I am sure. Anything goes apparently is the motto in Miami. You gotta love this place.

Miami the city that keeps the roof blazing

2012/07/01 § Leave a comment

Talking of age. In Miami you are either attractive and young, or rich. Some seem to be attractive and rich, but nobody likes them.

One thing for sure, showing off is compulsory here.

I like it thus far. The beaches are pretty; the boobs are fake, and the weather not too warm. I went to Key Biscayne, a place most tourist will never be confronted with. But locals love it. I really liked it too. There is a lighthouse and nice beaches where you will find families with kids rather than wannabe pornstars and pretend-pimps.

Other than that Miami south beach apparently is the party place of the US. And if this party has a location than it is the hostel in which I reside. The location has a party-centre of course. My bed stands precisely one floor above it. Right above this epicenter of fun, whimsy dresses and far too loud club music. Yeah, talking of age.

Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Miami, uh, uh Southbeach, bringin the heat, uh!

2012/07/01 § Leave a comment

The business part of my USA trip ended on Friday eve. I went to the airport in Atlanta in order to catch a flight to Florida. I made sure to get to the airport early, which was a wise decision, considering that I ended up in thick traffic and security checks in the US are notoriously thorough and slow. Luckily my flight was delayed by 3 hours. When we finally arrive, close to midnight already, the shuttle bus to the car rental company was unreachable but eventually picked us up. Fair enough, it was late and sure not much going on any more. Well, actually 6 people were waiting before me to get their car. It took forever- at least I got an upgrade as compensation. Apparently the staff was half asleep already, which may explain why they handed me a broken navigation system.

I noticed that when it suddenly just shut off without ever turning on again. With a little luck I found my hostel. It was already well past 1 at this point. Fortunately I had booked a single room, so the deserved rest was in reach. Yeah, right.

The guy behind the counter sent me off to another building some 15 minutes drive away. Great of him to give me the wrong building number, hence I had to go back again. He then gave me a new address. However, I could not get into the building with the key he had given me. You must love the widespread inefficiency in the US and the abundant disinterested staff: No wait, you don’t.

However, the room was run down, dirty, the door looked as if someone had previously broken in, the building reeked of mold, the taps were dripping, and the atmosphere resembled hotel California, although this is Florida: You can check in but you can never leave. So off I went, back again. This time I was not in the mood to argue about the conditions. I had made up my mind. But since it was past 3 in the morning I agreed to stay in a hostel room instead. A great start of my holidays that were supposed to relax me.

After discussing with the manager I received my money back for last night and I decided to stay in the dorm room. I won’t be in much anyhow and I am so used to this, it does not matter at all. Besides, this way I can at least meet some nice people. Although they are half my age.

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